Monday 31 March 2014

Diary 31st March 2014

Well today was to be the last day of my therapy session. Certainly, I haven't seen the last of my homophobia days. No question of it. When I went in, the first question he asked, knowing it would be our last session, "What question have you got answered here while at the session". Me being puzzled. Then shortly afterwards, he said something uncomprehendaly, and my reply was very interesting but celrver "As Homer Simpson would say, Speak English Doc. ". So he tried explaining. Then afterwards we got into a long discussion which took the most of the session as to what to do relating to "The Invitation", which am relating to Eileen's 80th. I expressed to him, that if I were to be invited I prob wouldn't go. I then said that I have no interest in getting back wit em, as for a simple reason, that everytime I'm with Mom, Dad, Maureen and the Rels' that all I ever think of is the homophobic treatment. So I asked if there was a way, I could turn away from such if ever I was in the vicinity of the above mentioned. He simply said NO. So he then asked me if there was a special trait I had developed since I started the sessions. I simply answered yes the "thoughts". I explained that ever since the depression started, that I am clearly thinking about something on a constant basis. A deeply disrubruing one but sadly the truth is what happens if the landlord rapes me or evicts me or antoehr one I have had for a very long long time, is how would I deal with the detachment from my babes: Scarfies, Inflatables and my Stuffed Puppies. He went on to say that it could happen over night or a gradual course if I were to meet a guy. So I continued to say, that ever since the will was brought up, all I'm thinking of hence the "thoughts" is that I wanna be buried with Scarfies around me in da coffin and da puppies and da Inflatables. He found that quite disturbing, he didn't have to say anything. That was the last item, before we departed. He asked me what was the first thought that came to mind. I said that as I was walking up the driveway, "Now, just go in with the view that you're finishing up". and also "If he begs you to continue to seeing him". He went on to ask why would I be thinking such. So with a finale he said that he has to wright a report or referral back to my Referrer. So I may have to go back to my origin.

Diary 30th March 2014

Well today was quite an interesting and productive day. I got up quite alot late today. Had no interest in showering, as I'd normally would. Perhaps whatever was on my mind, didn't help. I just can't understand why I'm wanting to rekindle my friendship with Adam. Like he's straight, which I don't mind, but it bothers me that he's acting strange with me, and has been for awhile. So I headed onto Crina with all this on my mind. WE looked at Mike and Molly, The Millers and The Golden Girls. WE chatted and chatted. One thing that disturbs me thou and light bulb as I like to call it, is that I realised something hence Light Bulb; that my relatives Ailish, and Co WERE actually responsible for my homophobia. And how I know this is quite simple. My Aunty(ahem my former now) Eileen is having her 80th Birthday on da 12th of next month. Now if my mom thought that I should be at the party, she would have invited us m y sis n I to the party. She hasn't even broached the subject which can only mean one thing. That the truth has been told, that they were responsible for the suicicadtion of myself. A few weeks ago, I pleaded my apology to one of them and I quite expected them to get back to me ie via Facebook as in to re add me or at the very least to unblock me(UPDATE - He's actually unblocked me). But if i'm to get my mentality back, I have to get rid of em. Which so far all going to plan. Like at the end of the day, its my sis who has to see the result of the  homophobic abuse - ie suicide attempts naley the strangulation. It is my intention to get rid of em compelytly instead of going back to to em, Like thinking about it, more it makes sense. Like when her sister(Ailish's sister) was over, Ailsih had wanted me to meet up with her. However I got the willies, so I texted both of em, but no reply. So yeah, can't be bothered with em at all. Everytime I'm up in the house namely my folks' place the memories floods me. My Mom invited me up to their place last week to call up this week. However with the memories keep flooding me, I just can't.

Saturday 29 March 2014

Diary 29th March 2014

Well today we being Mom, Dad and I had plans for to celebrate Mother's Day which technically is tomorrow 30th March. But with kids being in the way etc., and the fact that my Dad loves GAA on a Sunday. I got up with a horrible fullyish stomach. But nevertheless got up. I realised I had no pen to write my mom's card. So had to bring da card with me in the car and of course the pressie. I asked me Da for a pen to write. So I wrote the card and gave both pressie and Card to Mom. Then we all realised that I wasn't given an envelope which I found weird and only relasied when I hopped into the car. So we collected Crina and headed to TGIF Fridays out in Airside. We all had a great laugh. Til we got to the part of the bike. My mom wants me to cycle for protection reasons as she feels its alot safer on a bike than walking. While I totally gets where she's coming from, however I must protest for reasons of me being knocked down. I told her that Dublin where I live is a "deathtrap" as I was telling Gerry yesterday at the Outhouse. She clearly didn't appreciate this. She started getting in on the money act, which I totally hate. Crina got in on the act. Dad kept his cool and mouth shut. They both had cornered me into buying a bike for me a few weeks ago. So to be honest it was Mom and Dad's doing in terms of wasting money, so why do I feel like I wasted their money then. Well its quite simple. I wanna loose da weight to 9st 5lb. I was recently told for that to occur that would take walking and not cycling. But hey. Eitherway I enjoy walking. Have done so immenlsely. I will use the bike for when am with DublinFreeWheelers and and longer journey such as a cycle tot he south side now that'd be pushing it in terms of walking from the North to the South. I've only every walked 30mins. So we dropped by in there place. Stayed for a bit. However unfortunately poor auld Crina got a bit of a panick attack when she realised that her birthday is next week and to top that off, that she'd be seeing her nemisis Ailish. However I doubt that will happen. But I will be discussing this matter with the tomorrow.

So after a half nice half not so nice day with the folks, I headed by foot of course to the cinema to the Meetup. I just so happen to see that the Meetup had been scheduled for today but was moved to next week of which I did not appreciate. So I text the organizer to see what gives. He explained that alrhoguht the meetup in question was moved to next week, that he himself would be going regardless. I'm referring to Adam as the organiser of the meetup. I decided to head in to see Captain America: The Winter Soldier(Review here.)I was between two minds to go or not to go. I was gonna forgoe the money I had to pay. But what enticed me to go was to see if I could re-establish the problems that both of us have been having. I enjoyed the film immensley especially in iMAX.  Damn it was so fine. So then I wanted to try and reconnect with him as a friendly way.

So onto the next film of Muppets Most Wanted(Review here.). I totally enjoyed the movie. Singing to my heart's content. Before the movie itself started, we chatted or so I thought we were. He showed no interest in the Muppets whatsoever. To each is their own. However one thing I find disturbing is, that he initially asked what trailers were on while he was getting food. I replied one of em was Tarzan. I for some reason told him that I never heard of Tarzan other than a Disney character. He was gobsmacked. I've never seen the likes of it. Made a huge deal. He said it was some famous Character, fictitious might I add. Even after the movie, when we were going downstairs the escalators, he said that you not knowing who Tarzan was just outta this world. Something to that affect. Looks like antoehr person off my Christmas Card list. He wasn't making sense with regards the meetup confusion etc., Like put it this way. I had paid for the film in advanced(I'm relating to the first film). And he says he sent an email, but what if those who had paid for it in advanced, paid for it, then to be told that there is no meetup. He was taking great offence with my slowiness. One thing which I don't appreciate might I add.

Friday 28 March 2014

Diary 28th March 2014

Well today I got up with a fresh feel with a ring on my door, of which I ignored as per normal. Its become a bit of a habbit of mine to ignore all family members phonecalls and/or ring doorbells. I mainly answer family calls if I'm up and about in my home. NEVER when am at the Outhouse or as I said to someone there last Wed, I don't answer family calls in my haven.

I proceeded to head to the Outhouse firstly to get a wrap and a cuppa tea. Twas lovely company. Quite a vibrant area. I saw Brendan S there too. Twas wonderful to see him after a long time. He was heading to see The Hercules film. I advised him to see Starred Up if he wanna see Jack Connell hunky. Review here..

So with that I proceeded to head onto Cineworld to see Muppets Most Wanted. Review here. On my way I saw a woman that something fell out of her hands. So I saw that it was a Leap Card. So I decided to run after her and give it to her. She got such a fright. I wasn't gonna do anything, but hey.

So after the above film, I headed back to the Outhouse for a cuppa. Lovely to see Gerry too. We chatted for a bit. One topic of area of interest, I forgot to mention was that of cycling. I had previously told him of the stolen bike back in Feb. Blog entry here. Ever since I was knocked down by a car, I have been a bit weary of cycling in the city. Its a deathtrap I explained. So I have been walking all over the city. I went onto explain to him, if I need to get to the other side of the city or its a fair jounrey then, Ill prob go along and cycle. I went onto say that I have joined the DublinFreeWheeelers. So Ill prob go along with them. He went in reply to say that's a good idea and a safer option. I said in reply if I know ama gonna b late, then I shall cycle along and of course if its a fair jounrey to get to.

THen was time to go to my next film of the day and my last - hahaha. Popped along to see Captain America: The WInter Soldier. Review here. I was advised previously that there are two shorts at the end. When I went to get food ie popcorn, I notced that my Cineworld Unlimited Card had disappeared yet again. So shortly before the film started, I exclaimed to myself and I quote: "I fucking hate this". I was referring to myself constantly leaving something behind, loosing stuff etc., Me heads all over the place. Carelessness etc., So after the movie, I decided to head to the previous Screen and have a looksie around, however no surprise. So I went to the security. He asked me for my name and I told him "Georgian Stanescu". He said something like "Roma". I said no, am looking to know if my card was handed in. He said he's a Romanian and that we could converse in Romanian. I said that I don't have Romanian, so if he could please look up and find if a card was handed in. So eventually he found the card. Was over the moon and delighted that I won't have to pay another €16, ahem if they allow 2 misplaced cards within a week.

So with that in mind, I proceeded to walk home to my wonderful abode.


Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Went along to one of 2014s Movie blockbusters. I most enjoyed the film. Action fantastico. As with any Action flick based on a comic book or whatever, I have a difficulty in terms of the plot. I mainly go to these flicks for da guys being hot, and of course the action in question.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1843866/?ref_=nv_sr_1




Muppets Most Wanted

Was most impressed with this movie titled. Totally enjoyable. I got a bit emotional when I saw Celine Dion. What a performance. I had initially had heard from Morning Edition that there would be Cameos. The music was fantastic. As I have expressed in the past, I totally enjoy music in movies. I personally feel that it ads tot the movie. To see big names such as Usher, Gaga and of course Celeine. The plot is very simple. Kermit the frog, is replaced and switched over to Constnatine(described as the most dangerous frog in the world). Constantine has escaped. The Muppets are doing concerts. Of which we learn throughout the movie is a ploy to carry out a Jewel heist in London. Its cleverly done to the point they travel around from Berlin, Madrid, Dublin, and then London. They travel to each city as a Treasure Hunt. I thought it was a fantastic film. I highly recommend this film.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2281587/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Thursday 27 March 2014

Gay Quotes

The white light streams down to be broken up by those human prisms into all the colors of the rainbow. Take your own color in the pattern and be just that. -Charles R. Brown

Diary 27th March 2014

Well what an interesting nightmare I had. More so a dream. But I consider it a nightmare as it rehashed up my homophobia days but in the NON-Family sense. Ill explain in due course. I'm at a restaurant with my Sis, Mom and someone else(of which I can't remember - Either Paps, or my Auntie. )Then a guy passes the table and says "Fag". Now initially I don't pay heed to it at all as the guy that I saw, I knew but not as well. He would have been in my college, but never hung around with him. But when I got closer to him, I exclaimed "YOU" as in a guy I removed him from Facebook recently. When I was doing a Higher Diploma(during my breakup), I didn't pay attention to the course. But the guy was very cold towards me throughout the course. But which has been explained since then. I was very upset when I learned who the guy was actually. I then lean towards the family members and in a tearful state, ask them "Do you know what a Fag is?" Now Crina my sis obv knows about me, so it was more directed towards me mother. So then after awhile, I am sitting down, and Crina is comforting me. Then my mother comes up and says "This is really upsetting you, ain't it?"

So then, I woke up from the dream/nightmare. Now you's know why its considered a nightmare. All my homophobia days rehashed. Its a "never ending trip" as they say. Just don't know what to do. PHysoctherapy ain't helping, me getting my anger at the Relatives ain't helping actually made things worse. So now I've no relatives. I do of course have Mom, Dad and Maureen and who could forget my Sis. SO I struggled to get outta bed for several hours. Not even TV, enticed me to get up. I simply have no motivations whatsoever in life. I've no love for helping people in computing anymore. They's just taking advantage of me, just to keep me entertained etc., So then I suddenly realised that I wanted the RTE 9'o clock news as I learned yesterday's current affairs that our Justice Ministery will be making a huge announcement over on Thursday. So bottomline, Politics got me outta bed. Cause there's huge controversy in our police force.

So when I got up, I had my phone on Flash mode to show my way round in the dark.I had dropped the phone behind the bed. as I couldn't reach it, I had to take the head board off. Now me in my undies, and trying to put the head board back, wasn't the best idea yet. But had to be done. And not only that, being horribly cold and all.

Wednesday 26 March 2014

Diary 26th March 2014

My Aunt was due to visit my sis today. She leaves elsewhere now. I was going to take a tiddle. Funny, I said to myself, I bet she will leave something outside my place. BUT with persistence ringing of my doorbell. Now that actually did happen. How great minds think alike.

So after the doorbell, ringing, I got up, and showered. Again with the neck down, I can't have water on the head due to the injures I endured last Sunday afternoon while showering.

So then I headed onto Cineworld to see first The Grand Budapest HOtel. Review here. On my way in, I have noticed that I get odd loooks, as much to say that I m a tughie. Its quite discerning alrite. I'm no such thing. I can understand why the REAL toughies get such looks. But ME, ????

So after the film, I then headed back to Tescos to get a few items. I wanted to see if there was any new Free From range. The clerk didn't know what I was talking about. So I decided to get a few Porridge Flavors. etc.,

So then I headed tot he Outhouse, of which I realised that I forgot the milk. I was suppose to bring my little milk, the pyramid ones. Realsiing I left that behind, I was suppose to get some in Tescos, of which I also forgot. Hahha. So armed with this sudden realisation, I got myself a cuppa tea and a wrap salad. I noted that there was ham. I asked the lads that were there, that I understood that "Salad" meant lettuce, tomatoes and cheese MINUS the meat. They actually said that SALAD does actually include meat. There is no rule as per say. So with that aside, we had great laughs. They were also concerned with what had happened to my head. I explained that with "embarrassment", I was "self pleasuring", my Georgian jnr., and that I blacked out. However I did explain that my heart was beating like mad before the blackening and self pleasuring. However when I started the self pleasing the heart gave out, and literally collapsed. Or as I said in a simpler language for myself, The heart wanted to stop, but when I went to self pleasure The heart then says feck this am outta ere. So I collapsed like RoboCop.

So then I went back to Cineworld to see my babe: Jack O' Connell from 300: Rise of an Empire. Review here to see in Starred Up. Review here.

So afterwards I headed back home. And since been relaxing.

Starred Up

PS. This post contains NSFW Content.

Well what can I say. Normally I'm not into Prison Drama films whatsoever, not even TV Shows. However the real reason was after seeing Jack O' Connell in 300: Rise of an Empire(Review here.), I just had to see him in this. Boy was there plenny use of the word "fuck". Every second word was with it. I said and I quote "The gays are gonna love this film. ". From what I could understand, there were gay lovers. And who could forget Jack's cock. Awww what a film. Then the wrestling scene. OH BOI. 
On a Film review level thou, the accent was VERY DIFFICULT to understand. To the point I was left guessing on a constant basis. As I said above, I am NOT into prison films or anything relating to a prison. The film Escape Plan was based in a prison BUT, it had a plot. With this, I just didn't have a clue what was going on. I went to the film with the idea of saying Jack's precious.


Tuesday 25 March 2014

Gay QUotes

The token gay character is always so funny and so fantastic. That's happened a lot. Or they're often purely victims. (Ezra Miller) - Gay Quotes 4 You! (android app)

Gay Quotes

Gay TV has been immensely important in transforming American culture in a more gay-positive direction. (Tony Kushner) - Gay Quotes 4 You! (android app)

Gay Quotes

People who can't think of anything else but whether the person you love is indented or convex should be doomed not to think of anything else but that, and so miss the other ninety-five percent of life. -Robert Towne

Gay QUotes Android App

Diary 25th March 2014

Russia n Jews
Like heres something to rattle ur cages. Just cause I decide to sleep in the nip( with my duvet - oh so cosy.) I am immediatly in my dream. I am ordered around
Maureen n some guy on a tight schedule before her boss comes over.
Am at a dancehall with both genders at a time i wasn't out. I recognised one of the Irish schools ie gaeltachts. They r all in their undies coinciding with National Underwear Day as a support from for a charity.

So after the weird dreams, I wake up to lots of banging. So I leave it. Then I get up eventually and get ready for shower. I decided to start on my porn downloading. As my Lappy don't like it, when am surfing the web. So while am out, or whatever, I decide to download while Im not around. So anyways, I started the day with showering. Now I was advised with my recent injuries that I stay clear away from getting water contact on my head. Twas tough but was done.

So then I got myself ready. With every attire I put on, I started a porn download. Quite interesting it was. So when I was fooly dressed,. I rang back my mom to 9 missed calls, she had told me that she was calling down, to bring me to get my State Benefits and to do grocery shopping.

As well as collecting my beneigfirst, I decided to ask the clerk person to see would they accept a disheveled TV Licence Stamp Book. Bearing in my mind it was in bits due to flood damage. To my surprise they said they would accept it when my licenese is up. So that's an extra €4 now for awhile in my pocket. haahah..

Then onto the grocery shopping. On the way, Dad dropped Mom off at a local garage, to collect her car from local garage from repairs. So then we went onwards and upwards to the shopping center. WE got a few items. While I was there, I was delighted to see that Tesco now offer more optional Vegan and Vegetarianism in terms of dairy products.

Then we both went onto his place. He had a question relating to his bill. He wanted to know something about a security question on his Online Account. So I tried it. I logged in, no such item ever occurred. So I explained to Dad that its a possibility that he pressed a link that stated "Forgotten your password" cause when I pressed the link and an image of several different numbers appeared he remembered the image.

So I came home for a brief period and then headed onto Crina's. Twas a wonderful night. We looked at Mike and Molly for the night.

Monday 24 March 2014

Diary 24th March 2014

Well today was my apparently my penultimate appointment with my psychotherapist. It was my intention to finish up. However he wanted to finish up formally so to speak. We chatted about quite alot. In particular the dreams, I have been having. He was a bit troubled as to why I was expressing the term "vicious" in the dreams when there is no actual violence etc., in my dreams. I explained that to my opinion it is of a vicious nature when they are of "Nonsensical" nature.

So afterwards I headed up to my folks for me Paps to put the lights on the bike, as I didn't' have the tools, either that or I just didn't know where they were. However as it happens, I didn't need tools, and could have just as well done the job at home. However Dad rightly points out that my place with the coldness outside, wouldn't be suitable. Then I headed home in the wind and the rain.

So Im just gonna leave my lappy to transfer my Gay porn collection over to the TB Drive I bought a few weeks ago. Ahem thats 4TB. While at the same time downloading Twinks, Images and Solos. Oh boy what fun I will have down da line.But my main port of call is to try and get over the fear of having sex again. Its  a major hurdle I've been battleing with for a long time.

Sunday 23 March 2014

Diary 23rd March 2014

PS. This post contains NSFW Content.

Well what a day it started off with. With the excessive dreams I've been having. such as me in a work place celebrating my birthday or something, An "Annadal" in New York City. That name appeared. Then nonsensically an undone bed has been done. in the work place???? I mean like what gives. THen a dream I've had for years he appears outta now where. I'm in a factory style work place. There's a nemisis running after us. Funnily this work place actually connects with the above dream of celebrating my birthday or something.

Then when I actually wake up, I go to shower. and close all doors because of the coldness in my apparent and me naked. So I hope in the shower as per normal. Then shortly as I'm about to clean Georgian Jnr., I wank it to make it big. Then not even hard, everything appears dim and blurry. You'd swear I was drinking of which I can honestly say haven't had a drink since 16th March 2013. Apparently it was because the room was far too warm, and I appeared light headed. Just before things get worse, I attempted to get cold water on me, but by the time got even near the coldness, I was too late, and I fell like ROboCop did. Review here. In the film, ROboCop was escaping and went too far, so they literally killed the switch and he dropped. Thats the way happened to me. I literally fell like a ragdoll ahem, RoboCop. mmm. Then when I attempted to get up again, I appeared to have dropped again. Then when I was conscious I woke up with such a headache. So I layed there naked trying to get more cold water. But everytime I had any water contact my head was so painful. So I looked around my surrounding found that I took a pounding to a wooden shelfing, some glass as in a broken hand mirror. SO then int he mirror I use to shave me chest, I saw that I had a huge gash on me head, and another the side, and side of the nose, and another near the temple. Now before the wanking was occurring, my heart was beating like mad. Perhaps the hot water etc., So I ignored the heart and wanked. But that didn't stop the heart getting worse. I've never experienced anything like this. Alot of thoughts, was going through me head at the time the accident occurred.

I was looking at TV, I mean who doesn't. hahah, when my mother arrived to leave takeaways with me. However she got a shock when she saw the blood stain still gashing. She though I was in a fight or soothing. All that went through my mind was she thought because of the sexuality. However be that as it may, we chatted about none other than food intake. I still protested that it was the far too much steam. She kept insisting that I get outta here, my gaf. She said that sh'ed have to tell Crina as it would be a big blow to her.

And boy when I arrived, did it blow her mind. So she tended to the injuries. It was quite painful as expected. So we looked at Mike n Molly and Alpha and Omega 3. So cute da film is. Mom and Dad had called down, I did notice however that Dad couldn't' stop looking at the injuries. Well it was bandaged up by then.

Diary 22nd MArch 2014

Well today  I was due to go to a meetup for to see Muppets Most Wanted. However due to dreams and most exahustive, I was just not able to go. I had gone to bed very late alrite. Normally 3 hrs slepe would do me alrite. But couldnt just do it.

Friday 21 March 2014

Diary 21st March 2014

Something for ye all to ponder. What a nightmare I endure that lasted 55mins. I'm talking about Dreams of what else that goes on in me life.

Both Crina and I are beside a train station. We are at the Crosspoint barriers to notify us that there is a train coming, and we may not pass the tracks. We hear a warning signal. We see a small train r so what we thought was so cute. The small "train" and before our eyes  a military plane is transformed from a cute train and comes up and points at the two of us. I, in a state of panic just through my Smartphone: Samsung Galaxy S3 or what I've named it now is Sammy, on the tracks and they just literally have at it n start shooting as if it were a video game.  I'm in floods of tears. Even as I write this am in tears. I exclaimed "my phone".  The pilot guy came out with a horrible voice and went onto explain to disable location point. Something like that.
All that was going through my mind was but with the cell phone triangulation, whether or not the GPS or Location is disabled it won't make any difference. Another thing, that caught my surprise, why wasn't my sis in a fit. She was completely subtle, calm etc., Like anyone where there was a shooting, or machine gun or whatever should be screaming away like a sisssie and running a mile. My sis was just completely calm.

Separately
I'm in a restaurant with people, possibly a meetup. I ask for a soda or something.  However da waiter gets upset when I said not tea but soda.

Another:
Both mom and dad say we're heading out.  Somehow plans get really distorted as we're in a countryside possibly Wicklow(where my Mom is from). My mother goes into some farm house. Does something  apparently nice one as farmer thanks her by means of a hand gesture of thumbs up "country style" ie culchie

Another:
Something about Ros na Run. I look every where for "Evan"(Ros na Run character). Then shortly afterwards I'm ran after for telling a lie on FB. Cant remember.  But to do wit my scoliosis(of which I really have).

Another
I remember asking Pops why cant I see the men at the other side of the window. He said "reflection". IT was like we were in a box room. And the men are doing work of someform.

Last but not least
Now all these dreams occurred between 17.08 and 17.55. Something ain't wright. I'm shaking like s fruit basket. Tears coming outta me eyes.  

So when I was able to move around and got outta my shakes, or whatever yee all wanna call em, I got myself ready for tonight's movies. It was my intention to see both Labor Day with Brendan O' F and Starred Up on me own. 

I headed onto towards Cineworld. I had wanted to get  my sweat pants with Cuffed bottoms that I initially didn't want. The reason for the backwards, was the ones I have which are uncuffed, is as my dad puts it "Cleaning Griffith Ave with it" in otherwards, dragging all the shit, leaves etc., ruining the trousers. So gonna try these. However when I went to the floor of the sweatpants, I was met with a lovely model ie dummy. ie Mannican. I said I would get that as well. The shorts that were on offer, were a tad bit expensive but my size wasn't there. So I just got 2 t-shirts and a top and obv my sweatpants I was looking for. I was gonna get another scarf. However as the season is Spring, they don't sell it til next Winter. The clerk who was tilling the stuff for me, joked with me perhaps July they might start selling. hahah. She was making a point that the Summer in Ireland can be very unpredictable. 

So onwards to the Outhouse. However when I reached there time wasn't on my hands, I decided to just get a takeaway cuppa tea, as I had run outta cash. 

So afterwards, I headed to Cineworld to meet Brendan for Labor Day. Review here. As I said previously it was my intention to go and see my Babe Mr. Hottie, Jack O' Connell. After seeing him in 300: Rise of an Empire(Review here), I just have to see him in Starred Up. I learned of recently from Morning Edition that the term "starred up" simply means Young guy or person in an Adult prison. Twas quite interesting to learn of this. Anyways, I went up tot he counter to collect my ticket and at the same time, wanting to book for the next film after Labor Day, Starred Up. However it wasn't to be. I was explained that firstly as I lost my Card, I need a ID to show a photo of me, to prove me. He wasn't gonna let me in, I don't find him to be of best customer service anyways. So didn't expect much from him. Then when he saw I was a bit uneasy, he decided to let me in. So then I next asked if I could book the Starred Up film. He explained as the two clash, that it can't be done. I exclaimed I've done this in the past with other staff members. So anyways, I went up and met Brendan. Before I went into the film, I told him about a few of my dreams. He went on to explain, that one shouldn't dwell on dreams. I remember asking him how often does he dream. He said every night something like that. So then we both went into the film. 

As I didn't want to go home early, I decided to  head to see Need For Speed. As always I enjoyed the film. Brendan headed off home. I stayed on and went to see the film. Review here. So then after a wonderful night, I headed home. 

Labor Day

I would highly recommend this film. Most heartwarming film I have seen to date. An ex-con is given a second chance. The plot of the film is whereby, Frank(Josh), has just escaped from Jail. We learn it was of Murder. He meets a very frail and fragile Adele(Winslet) and Henry, her son. Together they all slowly get used to each other. Henry has the father that he never had. As his previous father left his mother Adele. The movie is of Cooking nature. In that you get to learn how to make basic dishes such as Peach pie etc., Throughout the movie, there was flash backs of a character whom I was trying to figure out. One scene was where the character was pushing a girl and knocking her out. etc., I then put 2 and 2 together and found out it was actually Frank going through flashes. Initially I thought it was Adele's ex hubbie etc., It all ends a happie ending, in that Frank gets out after serving his time, and goes and sees if he can reconvene the relationship they once had.


Thursday 20 March 2014

Gay Quotes

For a long time I thought I wanted to be a nun. Then I realized that what I really wanted to be was a lesbian. -Mabel Maney

Diary 20th March 2014

Well today was to be of a quiet one. Tomorrow's gonna be a quiet a roller coaster for two movies. mmm. Can't wait.

I had a few interesting dreams. One of which was whereby am in a car and somebody in my car is shouting out words of interest. I then tell them, that guys this is where I used to live. The dream is in Griffith Ave.,(where I was reared).

Then on a separate dream, but relating to reality, It's Christmas time ie were exchanging gifts of some form. One thing that's quite noticeable thou is: That its int he olden days. ie not modern.So anyways, I come across a name on a list like J.R(something to that effect), and I say to a guy who's that? They ain't on my list in terms of knowing them. They have to be on my list to buy them a gift or at least to enter their home. This brings me to my reality topic. In that If a friend removes me from Facebook(Facebook being the center of all my social life style), I don't see the reason why they should be on my list on other sites such as Foursquare. I connect all my services and sites I'm on through Facebook. Anyone can if they do so wish add me on those services, that I sign up to, BUT if you remove me as a friend on Facebook you're gone on ALL sites.

So for the past few hours, I have been relaxing with TV and Booze Britain. andMusic Doucmetnary of SUsan BOye.

Wednesday 19 March 2014

Diary 19th March 2014

PS: BEFORE I CONTINUE, I MUST WARN YE, THIS IS AN NSFW POST.

Well today was quite interesting in what I learned. First and foremost, before I go anywhere, I normally get stuff required for where am going. E.g If i'm going to the Outhouse, I take my money, and my lacto free milk. If I'm going to the Cineworld I take my card, money as well. However with great regret, just before i went to bed, I searched everywhere for the card, couldn't find it. So I rang Cineworld Customer Care UK. I shall be getting my card in the post. However with that comes a financial corruption too, next month that is.

So armed with the a bit of sadness, came great happiness that I was able to change my name of the card, of which I only realised a few months ago. So I took the chance of getting them the change my name from George Coffey to Georgian Stanescu. The sooner I have my name changed on all my bills of which there's only 1 or 2 left, the better. I want nothing to do with the Coffeys which is kinda ironic when ya think about it. My uncle was a Coffey. Yet I grieved for  him. I guess I ain't a heartless bastard, as I thought I was. Then again who knows. I have been accused in the past. When ever someone calls me such, I usually reply simply saying "Yeah I know I don't have a papa(birth)". They hate this. I respected my Uncle no doubt. However with their religious beliefs we don't agree. Likewise on my Mom's side. So I've had to make a heartfelt decisions to just stick with my Sister who has been through thick and skin.

So with this new found information, I headed on to Cineworld. While on my way to the cinema, there was a few lads at a take away, and one of em, whipped out his cock. Boy was he a scorcher hottie. mmmmmm. He had it against a window for me to see. He must have been a ginger, as he had ginger pubes. I've felt like going over there and sucking him off. It was quite endowed(if my memory serves me right, that means big right????). Now what I'd like to ask meself first thou, is how da hell did he even know I was gay, maybe the pink watch, maybe with the scarf on me with my trackies. Who knows. I did notice one thing however, that everyone else was wearing some form of light clothing. However one thing, I should point out, that perhaps with my recent dietary change, that my body is colder than normal. My sis went trough he same thing recent months. She'd ask me if It was cold, and I say err no, quiet the opposite. She explained to me, that if you don't take proper diet, you're body ain't warm, ie, Food is Food for your body. Keeping it warm etc.,

So then I reached Cineworld. It took a few attempts for my Membership number to work off from my text. Eventually its all got sorted. Likewise getting the food. I didn't want the staff, seeing my hottie of a guy of my phone and off course, using my App Lock app I have installed. Anyways I got it all sorted, and headed on to see The Grand Budapest Hotel. Review here.

So after the film, I headed onto the Outhouse. I came across my mate Bernard. Twas lovely to see him. He explained about the dreams, I was quite interested to learn about the dreams that I have been having. I learned that dreams a person have, is actually connected to what your eyes see. While Bernanrd was up at the counter to get himself a cuppa tea, I overheard Joyce(she works as a volunteer) saying to him, that there was this guy Friar Allesandro. She mentioned the word "EAT". She was insinuating that Friar Allesandro is a hottie and sexy. Now Joyce who is in her 50+ gave me a great insight that there are actually straight people who are Allys. But fair play to her talking about a hottie of a babe. I just had to input my thoughts on him. I saw Friar Allesandro on The Saturday Night Show last week. He was also on Morning Edition this week. A singing priest. I explained to Bernard that he "came out" as a singing priest. Of which he explained to me that there are singing priests. Well I proceeded to say there's something special about this guy. Like why have him on both major TV shows. Perhaps its the fact that he's a Friar. Eitherway he's a babe. Bernard introduced to me his boyfriend Leon(Pls excuse the spelling).  Outhouse was quiet busy today. There was the Transgender group that is around every Wednesday well at least the last few Wednesday anyways. Most enjoyable seeing all the LGBT. Well Gays, and Transgender. Didn't see any Lesbian or Bisexuals. (Perhaps they could have been there, just not out). Eitherway lovely to see Outhouse so vibrant and busy. They then moved off. I saw David. Twas lovely and wonderful to see him. The last time I saw him(which was Christmas '13) he was telling me he was heading on a cruise in Feb of this year. He had a lovely time. I was sad to hear that OpenHouse(Ireland's HIV POz support network) from what I understood, is shutting down. He went onto explain that the Diocese owns it, and they are shutting it down. If I have misunderstood, pls don't hesitate to correct me.

So then I headed onto to see my 2nd movie of the night and see 300: Rise of an Empire. Review here. Just before the film in question started there was the preview of Captain America: The Winter Soldier. While that was on, people were confused, as to what was going on. This is about my 3rd time seeing 300: Rise of an Empire and everytime I went up, I was warned in advanced in case I was going into the wrong movie, that its just a preview. Of which was grand. But tonight, a member of staff(of which I was very surprise) with one of the customers came up to me and asked if this was a preview or was he at the wrong one. I said in an annoyance tone, that it was just a  preview. The staff member should have known, considering he works there. And secondly the customers should be told about the preview when they go to the screen or even when booking tickets.

However on my way home(great time to be thinking - hahaha), that if a person does not fit in with society or whatever, that we are a minority. SO to list in my opinion of people who are a: those of us who suffer from Mental Health we are discriminated against, sexuality(LGBT), Color of Skin, Race(Ethnicity), etc., If your not satisfiable because of your color of your skin or your sexuality or the country your from(Romania ur considered a ROma, China, Latino etc., or whatever there'll be discriminatory behavior. Now the reason I was thinking like this, is we the minority group should group up together and get together and fight back. Like a good mate of mine on FB a few months ago, did bring up a very interesting topic, namely a black person against our sexuality. Which is kinda funny when you think about it. He compared our civil rights(US anyways) to the Civil Rights Movements in the US, namely the slavery, racial color etc., So for a black person to go round preaching the bible or preaching gay is a sin etc., is quiet ironic don't ya all think.

Tuesday 18 March 2014

Diary 18th March 2014

My latest of dreams

Todd, Crina and I are at a cinema.  Throughout the movie Crina is showing me her phone. Todd is getting annoyed wit da light of her phone.  I'm sitting across da Isle. I said to Crina: "err Crina I don't think Todd is happy."  She ignores this.

Am wit Brendan O' F at a cinema.  Its a Documentary film. I'm reviewing it as the film is rolling

On the way home cause I'm speeding cycling I don't have time to stop at my set of lights so I swerve into a different direction.  And what do I see is a shower room in da middle of da street. I take the opportunity with all my bits concealed of course to shower.  There is a talk going on too of which I see but don't know the speaker.

Dreaming of speaking to Bryan Dobson and his twin of which I don't know in reality if he has a twin. Bryan is a newsanchor or our National Broadcaster RTE.

Then when all the dreaming was done, I woke up and showered. Then got ready to do my normal errands as Crina would put it.

So I headed to the Post Office.

While I was on the way, I was thinking to meself the following. When I'm with Mom and Dad I feel homophobia still hangs on me. When I'm with Rels of which shall remain nameless, I feel like this quiet boy who ain't out, when I'm with me mates and of course Crina and my mates(ahem gay ones - hahaah), I feel normal as in being who I want to be with my Inflatables and my Scarfies. With my straight counterparts(those that I go to cinema etc.,) I feel normal as in I can be who I want to be. Why is this so? Well I'll answer the question, simply put. If they can't accept my sexuality I simply don't bother going to the afters(after the film).

So I arrived at the Post Office and did my weekly errands. Collecting my Benenfirst, Topping up my Savings Book and transferring funds to my Bills Acc.

So then I slipped into the Clean Freaks to find out about my Duvet. After many weeks from Take 1, to Take 2 to Take 3 to Take 4 to my lucky number Take 5. I finally got my duvet back. He of course apologised for the delay.

So onwards I headed home. Then for the past few hrs, I have been looking at the RTE News coverage of the St. Patrick's Day Parade from yesterday.

So then I headed onto Crina's for a few hrs. I on the way, went to Tescos to get the tobacco that Crina wanted. I wanted to see if they had Pure butter. They didn't know what I was talking about. They were foreign and making me feel stupid. The shop assistant who was on the floor, said whatever we have here even with hand gestures. So when I went to pay for my stuff, I asked the clerk. She was most helpful. She simply said no that they didn't have the brand. So then I went to Centra on Malahide Rd., to get her milk and the tobacco. I also asked these if they have Pure Butter. They didn't. So I just headed onto Crinas. Twas a nice pleasant evening. We looked at The Golden Girls. As always funny as always.
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Diary 17th March 2014

As today is Ireland's National Holiday: St. Patrick's Day Parade I was due to go to a meetup of Photo Walk along the Parade Route, however I read on the meetup site, that there's a 5/pa which I hadn't' seen until the day in question. They also quoted another figure of 168/pa. So quite a confusion alrite. Considering I haven't partekn in their meetup ever, I didn't see the point in paying up. Now they probably didn't expect payment on the day. But I just didn't see the point. So I RSVPed to a No. So as a result, I just looked at Knots Landing and Dallas for the night. Then I hit the sack as one would say.

Monday 17 March 2014

Diary 16th March 2014

My one of a norm dreams.

I'm in my old place. Funny I had the same dream of this before. I don't seam to have put this particular dream up as I thought. Cause I recall it quite well. yet I mustn't have put it up on the blog. Some one driving mom's car. Michael Fina Silvia and Eileen get out the car in our driveway.  Eileen  not saying a word r smile and goes into Ailish. I hug Silvia.  I welcome all with open arms. Maureen heading to Donegal for some conference.

And another;

I had apparently said some not so nice stuff to Crina. Throughout out da nite I had apologise in an emotive hugging. I was hugging her continuously throughout the night while me crying my eyes out.

Then when I woke up, I got up and got ready to head to Crina's. I then realsied literally a few secs of closing the door that I had locked myself out. With that in mind, I rang my landlord, to let him know that I had locked myself. I left a voicemail, then a few hrs later 2 further calls. So when I arrived, I arrived to a warm welcome. We then looked Golden Girls for the night. I told Crina about me locking myself out. She wasn't pleased like who wouldn't. Crina and I were on call to Maureen. Maureen asked me what film to recommend. I said in a posh accent The Collector. She replied whats it about.  I said they collect The Bodys. She  misunderstood as in saying The Buddy. We cracked up laughing.  What a laugh. Tearful crying it lead me to. As I didn't want to bother Crina by staying overnight til the landlord came, I put it to her to try and get into my apartment. She brought 2 utensils to help get me back. I tried in vain all avenues. Until one of her utensils a kitchen knife, I decided to just try it. And low and behold it worked. I was delighted. So I got a cuppa tea for her. Then we both  headed back to her place for a further cuppa tea and Golden Girls.

What an interesting night. Great laugh with Maureen, Crina yet at the same time, sorry ass of a mind that I have.

Saturday 15 March 2014

Ryan Dolan - Start Again [Official Music Video]

The only thing I have to say: Very sad and "All because he was gay". Thats why he killed himself. By the time the closeted guy did something about it, it was TOO LATE. SO SAD



Diary 15th March 2014

Well I got up today with a view of going to a meetup for to see The Grand Budapest Hotel. Review here. Afterwards we all ascended outside the screen to wait for others to arrive out of the screen. SO we all went along and popped along to the nearby pub: The Black Sheep. We sat for about an hour chatting. More like small talk. There were 4 women and 3 of us(lads). We were chatting variously. I was most keen on learning about comics. I was made out to be of most weird guy. I've notice of late with Adam, that he's changed his tune on me. Not sure. It can't be because of my sexuality, cause he's known that for a while now. The first time I met Adam was at a meetup back then known as Cinema Craicers(Now known as Dublin Film Fanatics). After the film, we headed home afterwards and dispersed. However with him, the fact he lives in the South of the city, he was walking home with me. Somehow, all that was going through with me, was that he wanted a hookup or a chat in my flat or a cuppa tea or something. So shortly I remember before we turned onto the street I live on, I somehow I introduced sexuality. In that I actually said I was gay. From what I remember, he didn't mind. So as for showing a funny side or whatever, it can't be my sexuality that bothers him. I actually thought he was gay. Like he don't show it that's a fact. I forgot to mention also while I was chatting to Adam yesterday, I some how asked him about New York. The only fault he had of it was the weather. He does make a point, however I pointed out that Ireland's weather is so confusing. Like rain in the summer etc., snow in February etc., Whereas in New York, Adam pointed out that its extremely cold in the Winter and Hot and warm in the Summer. So while chatting, 3 of the women left early, and one was left. She asked me where I was from, I understand she meant where am I living. But she meant originally so I replied Romania. So then she went onto say that Dracula says Romania differently(of which I didn't know), I proceeded to say Romania in the actual Romanian language, and likewise the the word Romanian in the Romanian language. She looked at me as much to say you're so weird. I've never met this woman. Of the whole lot of us, we were all very shy, very weird looking. It was so unreal. Like we came out of a cinema, we had plenny to talk about, yet we were all struggling as to what to talk about. Its no wonder I rarely go to the afters as one would say. I was most enjoyed chatting with another guy Robert. He's basically me, before I came out. A young shy person. As I said above, I was so enjoying chatting about his comics etc., When Adam said I should know all about the comics, the superheroes etc., He was reacting this way when I asked him what you mean the 8 Avengers, something like that. He treated me as a weirdo. As in "You know... the 8 Avengers: Hulk, Spiderman etc., "

The Grand Budapest Hotel

Totally enjoyed this film. Two words can describe this film. Confusing and comical. Wes' feature, promised great laughs. I asked one of the guys who was with me, what rating was it. I think its a 16(IFCO). PLenny of sexual references, and languages. I enjoyed it eimmensly. However that said, I found the narration of dates etc., so very confuisng. I would recommend seeing this film more than once. From my understanding, the plot is quite simple. Gustave(Fiennes) is accused of murder when one of his clients is murdered. WE find out who actually did it, (of whcih I won't ruin it for yee all)


Friday 14 March 2014

Diary 14th March 2014

Another dream

I'm about to board a boat(An ark type). Somehow my friend Emil is on or at least I'm coaxing him to get on it. Then afterwards we're all in a house, while looking out the window, we all see a Ramb(Male sheep) and seeing it, that it should be on the ark. So with this in mind, we all coax the ramb back on the boat. While we see the actual reason as to why the ramb was seen in the first place. So afterwards we learn the wreck that's after happening to the ark. So next scene were all aboard the boat. Then half way our destination(The world's our oysters), we get into difficulty. Then there's a pet mouse, struggling to catch a string of some form, and unforutnlayley falls into the debris. And the screams of the child who could be the owner of the pet or maybe is frightened about the whole experience??

After I got up, from the dream, I got up for to shower, then have been looking at yesterday's news(Wednesday 13th). Mom dropped down with a Takeaway or something. I remember quiet asking her why ain't she with her sissies or at least the Gallery. She always goes to her Gallery every Friday then she meets her sissies. She said it was to do with Eileen is getting surgery or recovering from it. So I made to her to get the Duvet back. She offered to go and see whats the story. I went in first and he told me that it ain't ready. So in a fit of rage Mom went in, I said don't. I know the guy. I felt like telling her he's my bf(I'm not sure if he's gay thou). To stop her going in. She then said, I used Petrol to drop you down. So she popped into see him. She didn't believe me. So Mom dropped me back. She left me at a church as she was going onto Westwood.

Then shortly afterwards I got ready for tonight's Movies shinding. heheh.

So as I was slightly late if I were to arrive for Brendan, I decided to use the bike that Pops got me yesterday. I had intended to walk into the Cinema, BUT at the sametiem, I wanted to call into the Outhouse.

So then shortly afterwards, I headed to Cineworld to meet Brendan to see Need For Speed. Review here. I put it to him before the film, if he wanted to see 300: Rise Of An Empire again. Review here. I have noticed of late thou, that everytime, I see a film I've seen more than once, that I actually understand it more, or else I get the missing connections connected. So after the films, we both headed off, he proceeded to headed off and went our separate ways.

Thursday 13 March 2014

Diary 13th March 2014

Well today it was my plan to go to Lidls for my bike stuff and then ALdis for the T-shirts. However I got a call from me Pops to help him initially with the Electrical Goods he wanted to get rid of. I pointed out that 1stly that I was wanting to go to Lidls and Aldis to get bike stuff. and 2dnly as I didn't have anything to get rid of that I wouldn't be of any use. However really he wanted help to get rid of his stuff. So I was cool with that. We organised to get to Lidls for 9sih. I decided that from now on isntead of being late and getting items that I want from both Aldis and Lidls that I stay up for them, and then head to bed.

So Dad collected me at my gate 9 and we both headed to Lilds. I went around with him, getting bits and pieces. Getting my fav. Bread. Then to the bike accessories.

Then on the way out, he suggested that we pop into Tescos to have a looksie. We got a few items. I asked him about Maureen getting a new phone. And boy was I not prepared for what was to happen next. As I understand it, she got a Samsung Galaxy Trend Plus(I looked up the O2 site based on "Samsung Galaxy" + €150). He suggested to Maureen that she don't get a sophisticated phone, considering her age and the fact that she don't need half those items. Of which I totally agreed. As my sis said previously, if she were to get a phone that sophisticated, it would to ensure both Crina n I are doing something worthwhile with our day. Which she speaks the truth too. Total bull if you ask me. But the truth.

So onwards we went onto Aldis. Dad stayed in the car, while I got my t-shirts. Of which I returned more than a few t-shirts. I actually got the sweat pants I was actually looking for. Was overda da moon to learn of this.

So we then headed back home, to his place. As he wanted to empty the car with all the shopping of ours and so to make room for the electrical to get rid of. WE headed to the recycling bank. We were surprised to see the Banks closed, no staff visible yet there was a tour of some form going on with school kids.

SO we headed back home. Dad had to be home for a plumber. Mom had come home from the hosp visiting her sister who's getting some nose jobs(lumps removal). So  we all sat down for a bit to eat. Dad got a phonecall from his Niece. They chatted for a bit. Mom thou wants me DESPERATELY outta my place. Unless my landlord has the balls to say Georgian, go elsewhere while we refurbish your place. Honestly not that hard. Mom also wants me to "sample" New York. I don't wanna. I wanna live there. She also wants me to go back to Technical Support either my means of a job or training or course or whatever. But I've grown outta of it. She asked me my plans for my 30th. I told her some of it, I didn't wanna tell her i Have plans of going to a Bathhouse(Boilerhouse). SO after a long comprehend and battle for freedom, I wanna headed home but first collect my duvet.

They gave me a surprise of which was by no means of a no battle zone, they both surprised me to get a bike for me. I told em I wanna waited for Crina's bday. which is in a few weeks. There's no saying NO to these two. hahah.

SO first we set about getting my duvet, of which was no surprise to learn that it ain't ready(what's new). Latest excuse is now that it won't be ready for another hour. Like I was gonna wait another hr let alone Mom n Dad who were dropping me down to the laundry.

So onwards we went to the bike. Dad bought me the bike. Funnily speaking, the bike I saw a few weeks ago was still there. hahaha. SO I met both Mom, Dad at my gaf.

So when I arrived home, I put stuff away. So now ama going into hibernation til tomoz. So ill speak to you all later after a long tiresome day.

Wednesday 12 March 2014

Diary 12th March 2014

I woke from yet another mysterious dream of mine. Never ending. hahah.

Alan Shatter TD (Minister of Justice, Equality & Law Reform) sees me chatting to another politician regarding something and just about as I head off, he comes up to me and in a fit of manic, he says I'll do anything to get you a your citizenship. In a fit of disgust, I just walk away.

In a separate dream, I'm walking down towards Drumcondra, towards home, I'm in a flood  with the water up to me ankles.

Now can anyone tell me what up with these dreams which are nonsensical. I have been accused in the past of mental. Its a possibility of truth alrite. My therapist can't even comprehend it. Not even my sis who has been through hell in the past few months. Just don't get it. Are they trying to tell me something? I mean like a politician i dream of??????

So when I got over the dreams, I proceeded to head into town to see a film I had already booked. Need for Speed.Review here. I asked me friend Brendan S to join me. Twas lovely to see him in a bright bubbly mood. Lord only knows ppl need guys like Brendan. So we both headed tot he screen and both enjoyed the film. He exclaimed he wouldn't see it again. Thats his personal opinion.

I then immediately went to the ticket booth and got meself another one for to see Monuments Men. Review here. Brendan headed off to the Outhouse, while I continued to mask myself in entertainment.


The Monuments Men

I found this film to be of very slow moving. I love films that tell the true story of something. Again as with any film with an educational perspective, twas lovely to see a bunch of men(Monuments Men) to be so interested in Art. They were trying to recover the Art the Nazis had stolen. Initially through out the film, I tried figuring it out, as to why did the German's want painting. Then a light bulb(or in my opinion anyways), They wanted to confiscate it off the Jews as they had done the Artwork. Then again my area in WW2, Jews and Nazis is very flaky. So forgive me otherwise. There was a bit of comic relief

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2177771/?ref_=nv_sr_1


Need For Speed

I went along to a lovely, heartwarming film. I enjoyed it immesnely. Twas a bit sad at times. But more so angry too. As the lead character was let off, with a crime he had committed. The plot simply to the best of my understanding, Aaron's character describes another friend Pete as a "brother", who sadly is killed off. The film surrounds itself in Car racing, Drag racing or whatever yee all call it. The black guy  dunno either the character or actor's name as Davey Wavey says "God Damn". He's such a babe. Loved his tricks. Especially with  the helicopter and the car. But one thing that stood out in the film, was SCENERY. Oh god, it was like I was in heaven. Then there were moments when my heart was pumping like mad. Oh and to see Rami's cahracter butt naked, we gays we're all given a treat. Oh boy.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2369135/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1


Tuesday 11 March 2014

Diary 11th March 2014

First of all, I would like to apologise for the mix up of dates of the last two diary entries. No ones perfect. hahaha

First off, my dream. I'm in this empty space. my landlord sees me in his van. I help him to back out the van. He is trying reverse his van out of weirdly Cian Park onto Drumcondra rd, which he bumps into a pole then goes and tries again. In the same dream, he is with me in empty room. I say with surprise "ain't this room smaller than the one am in. " Then in my imagination, I imagine the room divided into 3. The dream ends when the 3 NOW rooms are all filled in, and the living room is filled up with couches and so on and so forth


Well as with any Tuesday, I had a busy day schedule. Mom rang my door bell several times. Of which I didn't answer, Crina thou rang my door bell, of which I DID answer the doorbell. She was saying that she's the subject of being a piggy in the middle. I told her its quite simple, simply don't do what she asks of you. In this case, Mom  asked Crina to get me up so that we could all go for dinner. I had things to do of me own accord. I told Crina to not let Mom get to you. I said to Crina, that if she doesn't want to do something for say me, then don't do it. I guess its easier said than done.
While I was getting ready, Mom rang me, to see if she could help me with the Duvet(in bringing it home from the dry cleaners). She asked me whats going on(She was referring to what the landlord had threatened me eviction. last week.). I said there's nothing to worry about. He just wants me to clean up my place. So she went onto say that Crina said otherwise. We continued onto bicker to each other. Funniest thing I've heard in a very long time. It was just such a laugh. She said that "I have been looking for a place for you". I asked her when did you start looking for it. She said back in Aug '13, when Crina moved out. I told her that I had no interest in moving out EVER. The only time I will be moving out is for the US. I went onto say that I had told her umpteen times. Yet she ignored me. So unfortunately she's learning the hard way. She said that "she's quite a fool". I said that's not my problem. Crina told her hundreds of times, I told her umpteen. Yet she never listened to either of us. So she continued to say and I quote "There's alot of lieing going on. " And in reply I quickly said  "Well now you know how it feels like with my homophobia. Nothing but lies going on. "She was just gobsmacked and just didn't know what to say.

So with the idea of having the funniest thing I've heard in a long time(Mom saying I've been looking for a place for you), I headed onto the Post Office to get my weekly amt. I asked the clerk, If there was a way I could pay in increments instead. She said there was a solution alrite.

So with this in mind, I headed to Ryan's Hardware to get a bulb for the bathroom. He explained to me how the environmentally friendly bulbs work. Twas quite interesting. He explained it that the bulb is say a 60w, but works as 15w. I found this quite interesting.  He said that "ain't he pretty". heehhe. I had to laugh. Perhaps he saw my pink watch. I did however recalled to myself, when I was wanting to mend the watch the way he was apbrupt.

So then I headed on home, just a few yards away from home, I realsied that I had forgotten to get the Duvet. So onwards back to Clean Freaks. When I went into the shop I said "Take 2" and he said no. I said Damn. What up with this? I asked would a payment be required. He said no. He went onto explain that they had to re wash it as it had  a smell. So Ill try again on Thurs.

So then afterwards, I went onto Thunders to get a Mothers Day gift for Mom. So I got Mom a twin pack of Jam. Hopefully she'll like it. Twas lovely to see an American serving me. Her accent gave it away.

Then onto Tescos to get my Fairy Liquid stuff for the dishes. Then I saw the card, So got that. While inside I saw a Tanora Orange Soda based on Tangerine, I said I'd give it a go.

Then I headed home, now with everything for Mother's Day, my bathroom bulb everything BUT my Duvet.

So for the past few hrs, I have been looking at news. I was sad to hear of the passing of one of Fair City actors. Ar dhéas Dé go raibh a h-Ánam Dhíolas. So shortly Ill be heading to me sis.

So onwards then I headed to me Sis. Lovely to see her again. Normally I would see her on a Thurs, but as Ill be going Aldis, and Lidls to get stuff but this time early in the morn, I will be heading to bed afterwards after staying the night. Through out the night, I was thinking of making it more permanent. As Tues is the day am awake early, anyways. We both looked at Mike & Molly for the night. Wonderful it was as always. Great comedy in it. One of the issues it spelt out thou was that in order to get married in a Catholic Church at least in US anyways, not sure about here in Ireland, that 2 conditions must be met. 1 being, that you must be a practicing Catholic ie going to mass every week or whatever and secondly if you intend to bring children to the world, that you must raise them Catholic. I was gobsmacked when I heard of this. I had understood that the child can pick his her own religion or be atheist for that matter.

When I got home, I attempted to do my ordinary things on Lappy such as FB, Transferring files between HDD, downloading Android Apps via Web Browser(sending the apps to Sammy(Mobile Device - Smartphone)). Either it wasn't my night for computing or something but, Lappy wasn't behaving himself. Here's a sample of the trouble I had for the night:

  • Sound Not Working until after awhile despite no sound buttons or whatever muted
  • When clicking on right hand side(near the clock) ie the System Tray, nothing would happen. Just the Right click button would work.
  • The media player I use or my files is called GOM Media. He hasn't been himself of late. Everytime I go to open a file up in this player, I get a window, with no video file loading. Instead it crashes. Then an error is produced. Something like "The RPC Server is not available"
  • With simple commands such as right click or left click etc., a very long lag between each command. Then when its ready does it so quick.
  • Transfer Rates so painfully slow. Cannot believe it. I attempted to move over files of such as 7GB to a different hard drive from the C Drive. I folded in. As I  wasn't gonna wait hours for it to move over. But it took over 7  hrs just to move over that amount of files. I couldn't restart the Windows Explorer service as I needed it for to transfer the files. 
What a nightmare I endured. Lappy not well tonight. Hopefully tomorrow he'll be grand. 

Monday 10 March 2014

Diary 10th March 2014

Today I headed with my intention of finishing my therapy. We discussed a variety of things. Of which one of them being TRUTH. I expressed that I was seeking the truth to it all, and knowing I will never. Separately I also expressed that "the fact I haven't seen my Dad, says that I don't know him as well, as I thought. ".  I then went onto say to him, the fact that when I came out, that I didn't know him as well as I thought. Which is kinda sad. But what can ya do. He asked me how's the gardening going? I said he don't want me. Throughout the session he asked me, "What do you think, I'm thinking?" In relation to the gardening, I said that Crina told me and explained to me that his Dr. told him to loose the weight to help his BP and suggested that he do MORE, yeah u's heard me, more gardening. Now I know gardening does help you with weight loss etc., but with a person who has back problems and stiffness in his knees etc., this just don't make sense. If you want a person to loose the weight, there are hundreds of ways like walking(oh boi). or whatever. And especially at his age, for a Dr. to suggest to him to do MORE gardening. Gawd sake man. So with this all in mind, just before I headed out, I then proceeded to inform him of my finishing therapy. But as I'm always the last minute guy, he preferred if I waited til I meet the next time to discuss the finishing up.

So afterwards, I came home, with the idea of finishing my recording of Dallas and Knot's Landing. When I got home my landlord was there. There's some work going on. He's still under the illusion of me moving out. I just don't understand it. His first question was "Do you have a place to go", So I proceeded to ask about the fire. and the alarm. So am waiting for him to clear things up. Hopefully soon. Eventually Frank and Co, came. The Electrician checked out the bulbs etc., of Kitchen, Bathroom and Heater in Bathroom. The Kitchen was found to be the Transformer had to be replaced. I knew it couldn't be the bulbs that I had. Cause they were brand new and yet they never worked. The Bathroom, he tried fixing it, he tightened the fixings and it was found that the bulb(which was brand new) didn't work either. So the electrician advised that I don't shake it or store in deep places where it can be shook. The Heater thou, couldn't be fixed as I explained they'd have to wait a few minutes perhaps a half hour. So they've come and gone now. So everything's cool hopefully. I just have to rearrange a few items.

So am now doing my last few Knots Landing episodes, before I knock off for the night.

Sunday 9 March 2014

Diary 9th March 2014

Well today was to be of quiet day, as with any other Sunday. I was getting ready to head to Crinas when Mom rang me for to give us a feed. I had told her that I'm heading out, and she says "ah no, I'm outside." So she then asked if I was going to Crina's. I said yeahhh. So she offered me a lift. Of which I took. I was delighted and surprised to hear that Crina had called up to me Paps,. So happy for her. As with some people Christmas can be heard for people. For some they can have lost loved ones, etc., So Mom dropped me along with the Chinese she had gotten us.

So Mom then left us to be, and headed off. So Crina and I chatted for a few hours, like any other Sunday. So then we looked at a few episodes of Mike and Molly. What a great laugh. I totally enjoyed it. Brought great memories and also reminded me of what my life awaits. Totally awesome. Then just before I headed off, as it was getting late, Crina advised that I do something about the landlord's eviction threat that he gave me last week. I told her, there's nothing that can be done. The lacky is just a bully. So we went through all options, homelessness, hostels etc., Somehow I didn't get the connection, but the Hep B was brought up, again I don't know why? But I'm thankful thou it was, as it actually proved that my Hep B didn't come int he form of STD., which am delighted(well to a certain degree, cause now I don't have to worry that I didn't get it from a guy). I actually got it in Romania ie my birth Mom. How I came across tot he conclusion, was that Crina had mentioned about Acute and Chronic. And I remember that my STD Councillor mentioned acute and chronic, I asked them can't you not vaccinate me, and they said no, it was TOO LATE, meaning the Hep B came from my mother.

I'm just so happy that my Sis has come back to herself. Boy did we all miss her. Keep well dear. We're all rooting for ya.

So onwards with all my scarfies, on the way home, I walked home in the cold. Then I came across the Declan Memorial Bridge, and a very BRIEF thought went through like a badness in me, whereby I go up the bridge and just fall off it. Again, I just don't know whats going on at all. I will be giving up the psychotherapy tomorrow. I can't see myself going through it for another several months. I thought it was working, but it ain't. My homophobia days will always be with me. I asked my sis earlier on, How can I get rid of it, she suggested good memories and try to think of em. I have tried. Oh Lordy lord lord, I have tried. I feel that am exactly the same as coming out as I am now a.k.a or simply put, I feel that I am back in my days of when I was suffering from Homophobia. Now obviously there's no actual homophobia now, but that's just my feeling.

Saturday 8 March 2014

Diary 8th March 2014

Kinda adorable when I'd have weird dreams. hahaha. But anyways, my latest is that my Mom is dropping me to a place. Something like a Jobs fair or some fair of sort. I am in some funny mood. Of which I don't know why. Then a quote I quite remember is "Oh crap I forgot my shoes to wear. Was in some funny mood. Den it was found they were just on the car floor?" hahaha

So when I got up. As my blankees are very sedating, I was totally exhausted when I got up. Then it didn't help with all the ringing of my doorbell. From what I could gather I think it was Maureen. So I went back to sleep. Then when it was time to get up, I realised that it would be very late by the time I arrive at the cinema. I was joining the Dublin Film Fanatics - the Meetup group I have been seeing movies with for awhile now. We were seeing 300: Rise of an Empire. So I said I may as well leave it. BUT then I realsied that as money was involved I may as well get my money's worth. Even though the Unlimited Card gets me access to free movies I had to pay €4.50 for the iMax version. So with this in mind, I hopped outta bed and headed for the cinema. It was my attitude that if I miss a bit of it, it don't matter. Yesterday I was between two minds whether to go to it or not and I just made an impulsive decision of to go as its a film of century they all talk about. So when I arrived I got my ticket and all and the food. When I arrived at the Screen in question, I was told that if I thought I was in the wrong film, I wasn't. They were showing a clip of the upcoming Captain America: The Winter Soldier. So everything was cool. Was delighted. Review of the film here. So after the movie, we all got together and discussed the movie. So onwards and upwards we all moved to the Black Sheep where they all go(depending on the business, they go elsewhere sometimes). I headed off from the group  to head home.

However on the way, as I didn't use my coins(as I thought that I didn't have enough - I had used my card for payments for the food), I had enough for to buy my vegan butter and a few other stuff. When I went to pay at the self service checkout, I was stuck for a .01c. Just so happens that a member of the Film Fanatics was there, kinda weird. haahah. So he lent me the cent. so afterall the who haha, the full bill came to 7.02(with the help of the friend). My initial plan was to use the credit card to use the  cent. However couldn't find it. But anyways I paid up in full, However the machine/system kept insisting I pay up the full 7.02. Which I actually did, the machine kept counting down etc., when it got to 0.00, it actually reset to payment due of 7.02. This was so weird. The staff had to contact managers, supervisors, staff and more importnalty security.

In the meantime my mate Brendan O' F, rang me to see if he wanted to see a film. After much debate, we decided to see the 300: Rise of the Empire(my second time). So while we all had a laugh, we all enjoyed the film in all its glory. As noted earlier on in Tesco, I wanted to buy Brendan and myself food, but as I couldn't find my card, we had to leave it, and headed to the film in question. Before Brendan arrived, I asked the person who served me the food for the first film, he hadn't seen it, as I thought I left it behind. SO afterwards, I decided to try the food after the film. Brendan headed off to get the Luas before it closed. So I tried the food again, then I had to wait around til the movie in the iMax was finished(where I reaslied I left it there). So afterawhile, I checked out the seating in iMax, but to no avail.  So unforutnayl I've had to block and get a new one(this time, my second time). I explained to Brendan that ain't the best of NOT loosing things.

300: The Rise Of An Empire.

I enjoyed the movie emmensley. A bit too bloody for my liking, but what drew me back for a seconda time was the musical score. I just had to hear the drums. It was fantastic. I asked others of the gorup I was with, what did they think of the first movie: "300". They preferred the first one. So bottomline, Its best to see the first one, to get the connection. When I saw the movie the second time, with my friend, I began to connect the missing pieces. So the plot I can now safely give you all is very simple. Greece V Persia(Old name of Iran - I think). The actual sex scene, I feel could have been let out compeltly. No need for it at all for a movie let alone a war movie. I had the hots for the character(Of which I couldn't get the name). I IMDBed it to find it was Jack O' Connell who played him. As one of the movie reviewer puts it, There is alot of "testosterone". Oh boy there was every truth to it.

Friday 7 March 2014

Diary 7th March 2014

Well I woke up from an interesting dream yet sobbing dream. Not sure whats going on with these. One of the dreams is that I'm in the Outhouse, and that a death of a person has occurred. As I'm signing in for security reasons, we all break down crying over this person.

When I got up, Hit the shower, then set about getting to PC World to get my External Hard Drive before closing time which is 7pm. I was there in the knick of time. So I decided to get my microSD card to solve my storage woes for my phone.

So afterwards I then headed to the Outhouse. Twas nice and quiet. Lovely to see a lively bunch. Dave who woks behind a counter, said something that brought quite fond memories of the good old days. He mentioned that in the hey days, that storage on a computer you'd get 20GB, and on a USB stick you'd get "excited" for having a 128MB. Oh what wonderful night with great fond memories.

I then headed to Cineworld to meet Brendan O' F. Lovely to see him again. I always enjoy his company. WE went to see The Book Thief. Review here. He had seen it already, however he wanted me to see it. I was between two minds of whether to see it or not. Before we went into the film, we both came across a guy who was in a Politcial Party called the Progressive Democrats. I have known him for a long time in the party. However since I came out to him(of which I cannot remember how), his behaviors and body analogue has changed. Its like I'm trying to get words outta him. Afterwards, I I asked Brendan if he's like this to you. and unfortunately he is. So perhaps he's gonna be another dumpee. As I said to Brendan what can ya do. So after the film, we headed to his bus stop. We noticed quite alot of disturbance on the streets. Of which to date, I ain't sure exactly whats going on. But anyways, I walked with him to his bus stop. Antoehr memories was brought back tot he good old days. This time in the form of secondary school. I went to a private school nearby my friends bus stop. Opposite his stop was a bookstore called Reads of which is still there. I told my friend that I used to always pop down to the Reads on my lunch break and either look at magazines or more so buy them.

So onwards home, I headed on my hour long walk. Totally enjoyable yet exhaustive.

The Book Thief

I popped along to the film. Twas a quite an interesting film. Very heartwarming. Completely emotional at the end thou. That said, I enjoyed it. The plot from what I gather is its based on a true story or a book. Not sure which. The plot thou a girl Liesal is left to Nazi parents of which the Pappa takes to the young girl, while the Mama doesn't. She does come around thou. Liesal's brother dies on the way to the new place. The family take in a Jew. For obv reasons they had to keep it hush hush. Twas lovely I might say. The bombs for a 2D film were so realistic, for a second I actually looked around to make sure there weren't real ones. hahaha. It was actually narrated by "Death" of which I didn't get whatsoever. My friend tried explaining it to me afterwards. One thing thou, that I have to mention is the title. Its slightly misleading, considering the film mainly concentrated through eh eyes of a girl who moved to a Street, Heven Street. Yeah she "borrowed" books, This was only a few times. Now whether this is actually based on a true story and or a book, it may be overlooked.

Thursday 6 March 2014

Diary 6th March 2014

I got up to several doorbells, for once it wasn't Mom or Maureen for that matter. It was actually my Landlord. He rang several times and my phone. I didn't answer the door as I didn't have the energy. So he left, so I continued sleeping til my alarm. However the ringing of the doorbell re occurred. I said I better answer as it must be that serious. So when I answered the door with a sleeve bitten in bits and it in tatters and in my underwear, I opened the door to a bitching or as I said to my friend Brendan S, "bitchful"welcome, he said two hurting things. 1 of which was the alarm, of which I can't control.

The alarm keeps going off whether am in the apartment or not. All windows and doors are closed yet it keeps going off. When I take a shower it still goes off. My diagnosis or prognosis is that there's wind or vibration that keeps setting it off.

I just had to stick the above paragraph in, just to give the background. The landlord claims that the neighbors, the tenants the public are quite annoyed. Hell even he said that he's had a fallen out with some. Now as I only got up very groggy and the sun beaming in on my eyes I had one eye closed as my eyes can't take the sun too well. I always squint. And secondly he asked me whether my place was in tip top position ie cleaned up. I said I was in the process. And his response in a strict manner "This day week it had better be done up or else your out". I just didn't know what to say. SO I let him off. So when I went back to bed, there were tears coming outta me eyes, hadn't a clue what just happened. I then began to take in what had happened, and process the information. Few items came to light. The way he was saying all this stuff. He was saying it with a strict voice BUT with a smile on his face as much as to say he was being held at gun point. ie he had a nervous smile. And secondaly, the fact that someone let alone some people fall out with him, over my alarm going off. Bit O.T.T don't ya all think. And another, the other day I was coming home from the Cinema or somewhere I didn't hear my alarm at all until I reached right my neighbor i.e. 225. Now to say that the Tenants, the Neighbors the Public especially the public???? Now that's exaggeration. So this led me to think could someone else have been involved. By this sentence I mean, that my mother wants me outta of the apartment that I'm currently renting. As said previously I have no intention of ever moving out until I move to New York City, USA. My mother would do anything. She even set up a viewing so that I could go along to it for last Monday. Of course she didn't go as I wasn't going for obvious reason. So with this in mind, as I write this sentence, my heart is pumping like mad and beating so high. I just remembered that my Mom(which I pray to God I'm wrong), that she could have threatened my landlord(as they don't see eye to eye) that if he didn't get rid of me, that she would bring him to court over what he did to my sis(of which I won't go into detail). The fact that he was very nervous in telling me the above two items. And another item, the law in Ireland states that the Tenant must be given two weeks notice. Now he mentioned in his threat that I have one week to get my place sorted. As I said, I couldn't start defending myself, by asking him what up with his tude etc., etc., as I had only got up etc.,

So onwards and upwards with my head held high, I decided to forget about him,(or at the very least attempt to). and head into town to do my errands. My first item on the agenda was to head to Lids to get some clothing. When I arrived, as expected(I was late - nothing new, hahah) I was able to get a few items, but instead got a few grocery items.

As I didn't get the items I was looking for, I headed to Penny's on Parnell St. The items that I missed out on were Canvass Shoes, and Sweat Pants. I was wanting em so badly, so I went everywhere looking for them. As I was going around looking for the sweat pants, I came across an unfamiliar term. Namely "Cuffed Leg". Now I never heard of it, let alone what it is. So I looked at the legs and found that the bottom of the legs of the pants, were actually elasticated at the ankles. I didn't like the look of it. So I asked do they have any "non-cuffed legs" one. They pointed me to one but they were slightly bigger. So I had to have it and bought it.

While I was on my way into town, I had left my card behind to get my 4TB hard drive of which I was very disappointed. So then I decided when I get to the Outhouse I will have a look just in case u'd never know I may have left it in the bag. But then I realised that I may have left behind my milk(lacto free) as the Outhouse don't provide such. So when I arrived, I bumped into me pal Brendan S. Twas wonderful to see him. And I also saw Mike K. Great to see all. Shortly after a mate who hung around with one of the guys who worked behind the counter(of which he ain't around anymore), called in to say hey. I haven't' seen him in ages. WE were all chatting and got in on the act as one would say. One topic that disturbed thou was he told us a story. He had said that he was at a local shop and came across a gay couple. One was double the gay guys age to be his grandpa. Something like that. I clearly didn't appreciate this. Of which I didn't say anything. My idea of age, its just a number. Don't care what age the guy is. I had a guy who was 9 years older than me. So I don't get what the prob is. Some may think ur after their inheritance, there money, sugar daddy or whatever. One thing that struck me thou which clearly I was totally against. Again one is entitled to his/her opinion. He said that guys who want to have a guy younger than him, he didn't specify the age gap, may be going through a life crisis. And may want to feel younger if he's with a younger guy than him. Not my kinda opinion. While I was there, both Mike and Brendan were codding each other around with the wraps that the Outhouse now sell. Twas a great night to a horrible start.

So then I started to make my way up to Crina as part of my weekly visit to Crina. While on my way, I decided to pop into a local grocery store to see if they had any vegan butter(I doubted it, of which I was sadly correct) but anyways, while I was in the store, I was listening to the store radio. and the topic of discussion was sexism in the work place in particular applying for a job. Part of the discussion had a caller call into the show. The caller stated that he wanted to apply for a job of reception i think. Clearly the job stated "Only females may apply". I was appauled to hear of this. When he applied he was turned down cause he was male. Totally mad I tells ya. For security and legal reason the company/business in question could not be named. So when I arrived at Crina's I was greeted with a lovely smile and could sense there was my old Crina coming back. Twas a wonderful to see of this. As I had missed the EuroSong due to my Box being full then I forgot to record the repeat last Monday, Crina said to bring my PVT(which allows to record live TV to USB Device), and connect it up to hers and record away. However as her setbox is of SCART(which my PVT requires) was used up, so we decided to leave it altogether. Ill get it in May of this year, when the Eurovision Song Contest of 2014 is on. SO with that, we chatted and laughed. She could tell I was down over the landlord crap. Just can't get over it. When I told her about the landlord bull, she nearly choked. So to cheer me up continuously through out the night, I increasingly saw the Old Crina coming back. Which really helped. I'm delighted to see Crina again. SO with that in mind, we were looking at the Millers, King of Queens n Two and Half Men(Charlies Sheen). One of the Millers episodes of which I can't wait to see now, was where the main character (of which very strangely like our mother) was constantly knowing her surprise birthday. Crina said there would be a twist at the end. Of which there was. I was totally amazed.

So shortly before I left, I put it to her the following. See will yeeee get it. I was thought in Algebra that a positive and positive gives you a positive and likewise a negative and negative gives you a negative. However a positive and negative gets you a negative etc., etc.,
SO I put it to her the following. I began asking her the sum of 3 and 3, You get 6. Then 2 and 2 you get 4. I asked her whats the commonality. She didn't' get it. I explained that the answers are both Even. So then I asked her what is 1 and 3, you get 4. likewise 2 and 3 you get 5. I had been thinking of this while I was sleeping(apparently light sleeping). So to summarise:

Algebra:


  • PLUS + PLUS = Positive
  • NEGATIVE + NEGATIVE = NEGATIVE
  • POSITIVE + NEGATIVE = NEGATIVE
  • PLUS - PLUS = Positive
  • NEGATIVE - NEGATIVE = NEGATIVE
  • POSITIVE - NEGATIVE = NEGATIVE
Pls correct me if i'm wrong. My maths is a bit rusty. Haven't done maths in several years. So to translate to EVEN and UNEVEN;

EVEN/UNEVEN Numbers:

  • 2+ 2 = 4
  • 3 + 3 = 6
  • 2 + 3 = 5
  • 5 - 5 = 0
  • 2 - 2 = 0
  • 6 - 3 = 3
The above maths proves that what I was thinking in my sleep(when am not thinking about weird things - hahaha, I'm dreaming, if not then what else)I proven above that:

  • EVEN numbers = POSITIVES(+)
  • UNEVEN numbers = NEGATIVES(-)