Today was to be a busy day to day, as in, I was suppose to go and get my haircut and to report my Bike being stolen to Bridewell Garda Station. However, I just didn't have the energy to get up for 3pm. :(.
As the weather was outrageous, my alarm kept going off waking me up hence my energy levels were very low. Then someone rang my doorbell once then went. Then I kept hearing a bang bang constantly, couldn't figure it out. So I just tried blanking it outta me mind. So while this was going on outside, I was thinking about me ex, which I have been of recent times. Don't know why. I then wanted to proclaim my love to him, but instead of saying I Love You Keith, I actually said Sean a guy I have been chatting to for a while now. I was thinking like this as I have been feeling unloved and very lonely of late. While I welcome my sister's new found friendship very much, and her depression hasnt been of da best, I have been feeling unloved with my folks lies don't help. As explained yesterday, I didn't ask them, why do they want me in their lives, if they can't accept their son etc.,
Usually if i'm going to the cinema with my mate Brendan O' F, we would arrange the night before or at least I'd get a missed call when I wake up and then we arrange. However when I didn't see anything, I was thinking sure I'll leave Dallas and Knots Landing(let the Box fill up - hence they don't get recorded) and just sleep it out, as I don't want to go to the cinema on me own AGAIN. As I said to Brendan S in the Outhouse last week, its grand if you want to be on your own, or with someone, depends on your mood etc., But low and behold I was delighted when Brendan O' F rang me, to see if I was up to see the film. Iniitally we were gonna see Dallas Buyer's Club, but becuase he's a homophobic ass(based on a true story), I wasn't in the mood for more crap coming out of a non education ass, so we diecided to head to see RoboCop. Review here.So I proceeded to head to the cinema (by walk hahaha). He rang me to remind me that the film begins at half 8, of which was no probs, as I'd be there by quarter past, at the very least. So when I arrived, who should be there but my other bestie Brendan S. So as the half 8 showing was an iMax showing, I didn't have enough cash for iMax, and besides I told em, the fact that the RoboCop iMax was not the best I've encountered in therms of iMax, and not only that we weren't given glasses the last time I was there last Friday night. I then learned from Brendan O' F, that it was actually iMax 2D, which I never heard of. But anyways I'm getting sidetracked, bottomline is, that we all decided to go to the 2D version which was jsut as good. This was at 9.15. So we all headed to the Cafe Bar where there's alcohol. So we just chatted quietly like tree bachelors etc., Brendan S, brought up a very intriguing topic, in that whenever he sees an attractive guy or seeing a guy he likes or whatever, he gets a hornball(hardon). I found it quite interesting, as I explained to em, that whenever I was with my ex, I never got a hardon, only if he were in his undies or whatever. But out and about nope never. So then Brendan S, asked a question which I made it into a joke. He said its a personal question and can he ask us both(Both Brendan O' F, and myself). So as a joke, I said to Brendan S, you want to know how big our dong is. We all had a great hearty laugh. Even as I right this, I am breaking my shite laughing. hahaha. I understood Brendan O' F knew my joke, but I told him anyways. So when we all settled down, we got serious and the question that Brendan S wanted to ask us, was actually interesting "When you look for a guy, what do you look for. Personality or Looks?". Brendan O' F replied with something simple but elegant. He would go with personality as natural. So then Brendan S asked me, what about you George, which would you prefer, I began by replying with a question which was "Must you have a sexual attraction to a guy that you find attractive emotionally or at the very least is it normal to have emotional attraction to a guy, than to have a sexual attraction". I then told the lads that with ex and I, there was no sexual intimacy. Although me ex would hint towards me several times. Brendan O' F asked me was it that the lack of knowledge or that you weren't attracted to him. I immediately said to him automatically lack of knowledge.While we were chatting, Brendan S, what does it mean when someone has the butterflys, which I've had several times. Brendan O' F replied "if your nervous about something". For me if i'm nervous I say wrong things, garbled, me heart pumping etc., We all left with the thought of the question I had asked em to the actual screen. Brendan O' F on the way told me that it yeah that it is normal. I asked Brendan O' F before the film, began the exact same thing we were discussing before we headed up, and his reply was, well if there's no sexual attraction but just emotional attraction, he proceeded to say, that its probably just a friendship that it will end up. Which took me a while to get use to the idea, in the end actually agreeing with him. As I have heard that it when you're with someone, that you need emotional, INTIMACY amongst other items.
Overall twas a wonderful evening full of advice, laughs,(where I get da laughs from me Da's jokes). Great night out was had by all.
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